Who Do I Bed?

So many men besides my slave to fuck but so little time…

I have always gotten a bunch of questions that boil down to the other men in the equation of cuckolding. My first thought was a post like my others put I had difficulty thinking about a way to go about writing it in a somewhat organized manner. Instead I decided to just write about it through a series of questions and answers.

Disclaimers:

1) This is not like most of my other posts in terms of taking a subject and being broad in theory form. This is mostly just about me and my personal preferences and experiences.

2) Questions came off the top of my head and are not in any order of importance or meant to flow.

Do you play with other submissives?

Great the first question even if it is not really about sex necessarily. I did want to answer this somewhere in my blog though.

I do not play or even meet other submissive men for a specific reason. Since sex is not something in my relationship that shows love and devotion in an exclusive way I am sensitive to anything that can also show that. Therefore my faithfulness to my man is shown by not being with other submissive men. For me personally my man’s devotion, obedience and willingness to suffer for me are the greatest, most touching and intimate things a man can do for me and I want to celebrate them in our relationship and not cheapen them by dilution.

Do you fuck dominants?

When I first started out cuckolding I would quite often as it was simpler in some ways. Over time my experience just were not all that good that I pretty much will avoid people in the power exchange life to bed. Personally my experiences I came to this preference because:

1) My favorite men to bed are ones that will overwhelm me sexually. I found while dominants can of course dominate they are overall worse then average at overwhelming me sexually. What I basically mean by this is many dominant men need too much validation of their sexual prowess and asks way too many questions during sex and that never allows my brain to be turned off and become overwhelmed.

2) A big problem with people in power exchange is assigning everything they do dominant and submissive characteristics and qualities. Too many dominants thinking sticking their penis in me means I have somehow submitted to them and think they can somehow get a relationship based on what they are deluding themselves into thinking what is going on. I am not looking to bottom or have some secret submissive side.

3) They often inevitably say something so stupid I lose all respect for them. For some reason despite communication to the otherwise most dominant men I was with knew I was of course cuckolding my guy and thought they could say something insulting and dismissive of him. Now if we were all together and playing it up for fun that is one thing but they inevitably would do this when we were in private and were serious. I have never understood why they cannot figure out the man I openly am with and have certainly told him I love many times and the man insults him. Do not ever go there!

Then who the hell do you fuck?

1) Open minded friends and co-workers. If my best path was not power exchange my next best path that I would have followed and is still within me is a person with pretty extreme hedonist beliefs. I am one that thinks sharing oneself sexually to a friend is not anything more then doing many others things we do for our friends. For example I am currently banging a friend who is going through a nasty divorce and child custody situation. He is too afraid to date anyone and I felt sorry for him and offer up my body to him when he feels the need to find a sexual outlet.

The other big area of this is my job situation. Working in an ER and night shifts means high stress, seeing and dealing with some serious bad shit and going home when most people are going to work. A good fuck is often a normal way to deal and decompress and hookups a common thing and something I enjoy and take full advantage of. Plus with irregular and uncommon off days it is just somewhat natural to hang with co-workers.

2) Men that catch my fancy. Not too often but sometimes between being horny and a way a man catches my sexual thoughts I can be seductive and try to bed him. It can be a one time or something ongoing based on the situation, what happens and any ongoing feelings of the lustful variety. These work really well when humiliation is desired in the cuckolding relationship as I am not a great actress and the more real vibe I am specifically horny for a man makes it more humiliating to my slave.

3) Self esteem boost. Sometimes a girl enjoys knowing she still can get a man to really want to nail her. There are just times I have found myself in situations where I had not planned to but somebody makes the moves on me that they make me believe I am very sexy to them that I will respond to. For example I joined a gym when I moved to KC and a twenty year old man flirted with me until I was so flattered he got to do me several times although I had nothing in common and pretty much wished he could shut his mouth and not talk.  But it was a nice reminder of the recovery power of young men and women’s gyms would be packed if they had that type of option for burning calories.

4) The cuckolding part is the main drive of the sexual activity. Maybe between longer stretches of not stepping out on my man for the way life sometimes work but most often just the lust that specifically seeking out and doing things to maximize the power exchange cuckolding experience I sometimes want to really indulge in it. For example weekend getaways and vacations I particularly get in the mood to do this. My ex and I would go on vacation in warm places often because he was an avid scuba diver. So while he would go off scuba diving I would head off to the beach or pool and troll for some cock. Some of the best times we had was hooking up with someone(s) and him be left alone all day and night often with some people at the place we were staying knowing what was going on.

How often do encounters happen?

There is no pattern or some ultimate goal with my sex life. I do like to cultivate a few friends with benefit types around but people have lives to live, get busy, not comfortable doing it in an ongoing situation and things like that. Having a “bull” or a “lover” (a term I never use) can be very enjoyable for many reasons but they do not usually last as they inevitably push for more then I will give and often will develop feelings or at least pretend to so they can try to manipulate me.

I have had plenty of significant stretches where no sex is happening and had stretches where I was so busy I was stretching myself too thin. I am not built for monogamy and life experiences have had me embrace this then be scared by it so I am more then likely to seek out then wait for something to happen when I go too long without.

Do I do date things, weekends together or trips with other men?

In general no to trips but might not rule that out in the future depending on the circumstances. Something like I have a lot more vacation time then my guy and a man I trust will not try to turn it into something more then it is then I would consider it.

Short things like weekends or an equivalent is totally open but the reasons have to be for something other then what my man can or wants to provide. For example when I was living in Denver with my odd days off I would think nothing of going with a man for a few days of skiing and frolicking during days my slave had to work. I have out of friendship played the girlfriend for a guy for a wedding out of town for example.

Date things are pretty much a must for any man that wants to see me on an ongoing basis. A lot of the non sexual stuff really can be the major catalyst in the humiliation aspects of cuckolding. Just reports of wham bam sex are not as deliciously effective as describing a whole night with romantic foreplay or doing things that got us so worked up we had crazy sex.

This stuff is often where you start walking up to the line and have to be careful. To just sex does not really do enough in the mind but doing things too much like your slave is truly completely replaceable is going too far. The goal and fun of what I like to think of as living a cuckold relationship compared to doing cuckold by scenes requires regular head play as opposed to more often in scene just little brain play.

What do I look for in a bull?

I am probably fairly common in what I look for in men compared to many women in terms of the mind for the most part wins out of sheer physical looks. Certainly if I like someone enough to be a friend and go to bed with them then looks do not really matter. I can have just a good of time with a well overweight and balding man then with a man that looks like Matt Damon.

Now in just a man for the most part just being sexual obviously you are not really looking for some complete guy and physical appearance can be the first thing we notice so I will not play political correct. I like men with great eyes that are of average build. Clean appearance and short hair a must. I dislike a lot of body art and men who are either too skinny or too muscle bound.

But what is going to spring my legs open fast is a man with a self confidence that conveys I would be lucky to get with them while coming off as non jerks or men with issues. As I wrote in my motivation entry I love submissive men and are actually attracted to them but the change of pace of getting with a man who does not need my approval and will take me for the ride is very good thing. I think this is not uncommon for a woman that cuckolds in a loving relationship and if you filter through the fiction and taking things to extreme in cyber is why all the bull type stereotypes seem to have traction when females contribute to the information. Basically all the alpha type characteristics and “real man” type comments are just a woman allowing when with one like that to turn off her alpha and enjoy the ride.

Does cock size matter?

 No! Too big can be the biggest problem I have as too small can have plenty of work arounds to please both. Yes, a larger cock can be somewhat more exciting then a smaller cock when you first feel/see it but that excitement or lack of excitement will be rendered meaningless depending on everything else. My ex had an above average cock that was about as big as I really enjoyed the most. My current sweetie has an average size and I adore it.

Cock size as importance outside of extreme small or large is something I equate to a kinky sexual thing. For most it does not matter, for some it is better but not needed and for size queens it is a true fetish where it is a turn on and sometime to the point the only way they can orgasm.

Does race matter?

I am planning eventually to write a post with this exclusively as a topic so I will be brief. No, race does not do anything for me. I welcome all races to my body!

Do you do different things sexually with other that you do not do with your slave?

No, my slave is the man that I love that is there with me, hopefully, day in and day out. I have no desire to deprive myself of sexual enjoyment by withholding something I enjoy and wait for another man to enter the picture. Outside of I do not top anyone but my slave I also do not withhold anything sexually from my bulls that I give to my slave.

Cream pies, do them or not?

While this seems to be a cyber obsession and many male cuckold wannabes really want to eat the cum of the men from their woman’s ass and pussy I only practice anal and vaginal intercourse with a condom on my bulls. Now while I think the internet tells of no protection sex all the time and I am sure there are some that in fact do this my bet is a fairly big majority of women are like me.

Now for my ex thirtieth birthday I did let a man I trusted very much cum inside me so he could enjoy this thing and I did it a few more times for him as a surprise over the years but that was the exception.

While not the same, there are ways to use the other man’s cum to humiliate and degrade your slave and I will save those for another time.

Do you have trouble finding men willing to fuck a married/attached woman?

No! I have had plenty of men though reject me because of it and all sorts of other reasons but if I am horny and determined enough I have been fortunate enough in life to find a man I am attracted to and willing.

One of the big benefits of  not caring if other people know I am not faithful and in fact more times then not enjoying they know is it is the best advertising available to attract people.

What do I tell other men about my situation with my other?

It all depends on the man and the situation. Generally I avoid power exchange type comments all together. I may hint at I wear the pants in the family or if the situation is where the man fucks me while my man is present, in the home or he picks me up when my guy is there then I may talk specifically about me cuckolding him in more straightforward terms.

But most of the time it is don’t’ ask and don’t tell which I think most men prefer. If pressed by a man I really like I will sometimes go I am into an agreed upon open marriage. If the man knows me as friend/coworker like way that is a pretty easy thing to sell and move on with. Pretty much any ongoing thing the man will have to get comfortable that my slave knows he is fucking me and the best bulls are ok and have no problem then being around my slave even if it just a quick hello and goodbye thing.

This is a pretty big play it by ear thing. Some men cannot handle that the man knows no matter the situation and some men just enjoy the illusion of taking me sexually thinking it is illicit.

Now some of the most fun to be had in cuckolding is being with the other guy and calling your slave. Now some men calling your guy especially when naked in a bed is too much for them. But some whether they know my guy is ok with it or they enjoy the deception a lot of fun can be had.

My main goal though in what to say is not to make the other man uncomfortable because of something I did because it hurts the quality and quantity of the sex.

Do you enjoy fucking men in front of your man or something more private?

It is complicated and something to write as an individual post. The quick answer is I like variety and enjoy both to be in my life. But the other guy is really everything in the equation to what you can do and how much fun or lack of fun it can be.

I am though as I have expressed now I can classify at many times a person that lives in a cuckold relationship and not one who cuckolds as a scene thing. There are simply always more factors then creating a performance and the goal for all is something we all enjoy and get a benefit out of, including my slave. For this reason I tend to not obsess on this particular aspect.

When you are fucking the other man do you think about your slave?

It just depends on the situation, my mood, the other man and on and on. Sometimes I never think of my slave and sometimes the humiliating cuckolding thoughts are the main things stoking a pleasurable experience. But most of the time it is somewhere in the middle where I can at times being doing one or the other when with another man.

Examples if I am stress out or bugged by seeing a particular bad thing at work and I bang a coworker the odds are my slave is never thought of. Just like if I have my slave help me prepare for a date and know afterwards we will re-live the date together then the odds are pretty good I will play up the cuckolding aspect big time in my head for pleasure.

It is something after all that can bring great pleasure when I am fucking a man that is not my slave and he just takes it like a good little slave should.