Rant: False One Ways

Thinking one is communicating smart when they are communicating ignorance

Here are a few of my favorite false one way truisms that I have seen from when I first started out in this life seventeen plus years ago that are still making the rounds today. I will write a little on why they are false but just for general purposes just the fact the people that promote these things as one way by that thought itself makes them false.

1) A mistress/master needs to first start out as a slave so they can understand what it is like in order to become a good and safe mistress/master.

I am a dominant and not a submissive but to me when a dominant communicates that are they not being incredibly dismissive of what it takes to be a slave? Because what they are communicating is pretty much take a person wired as opposite as you can get and they can be what a submissive can be.

The truth of course is while you could probably pick up some things to help they are going to be of the top/bottom type stuff and when being owned and serving someone without the motivations and wiring a submissive has makes most of what they would be doing completely a waste of time. By the way, just by the fact that they propose this is a sign of just how inexperienced they are about M/s RELATIONSHIPS. These are people only capable of thinking in top/bottom scenes. Most often this myth is stated by older male dominants and pro dommes. The men usually quite a bit older and never actually started out of as slaves but they are trying to get naïve females to ignore the huge age difference by trying to scare them to run toward them.

When I see this communicated I always reply “does that mean to be a good slave they should start off as a mistress/master.” To this day I still have yet to have an actual answer to the question.

2) The only safe way to learn a toy for a dominant is to first get it tried on you.

Pretty much the same thing as number one, you can learn something but not really anything of actual importance. If you are not masochistic and/or have deeply submissive feelings for the person then you are just not going to even come within a light year of experiencing what the bottom will experience. Once again it sounds good when not given any serious thought and is for the top wonders trying to promote their safety cred.

A dominant/top needs to learn how to be observant, go slow and know the person they are with to be safe just off the top of my head. People that promote this are almost always local community wonders because their thoughts are squarely centered on playing with strangers and not about being in an actual relationship where toys get played with as well.

3) Do not trust anyone claiming to be a master/mistress if they do not have years of experience in the local communities and they should have proof of this.

See the common theme running through these? The same people trying to quantify their greatness so the naïve of the life choose them over others, like much younger and other things that make humans attracted and compatible to each other.

Now I will in the future probably write a series of post on local communities that will come off that I am highly troubled by what they teach and do. But the fact is I am a product of a local community and my issues are more about the all or nothing aspect they promote and people failing to take the good and still keep an open mind about differences. Fortunately for myself I was in college at the time and questioning the man, so I took the good and in my private life learn my ways and my interests.

In today’s world a mind that is open to learning something can learn it many different ways. Whether a local community, books, the internet and any way else you can think of there are ways to learn and be safe as normal human thoughts and concerns apply. My personal one way truism is to try to be exposed to many ways and thoughts of something and make up your own mind and see what works best for you to learn.

Local communities have many good things but one of the big negatives is they almost always, for reasons not always their intention, tend to have one way notes and are not very good at exploring all the possibilities.

4) A slave’s only desire should be to please their mistress.

I have written about this enough already but since this was a list of my favorite false one way truisms I would be remiss not to include this whopper.

5) Anything proclaiming female superiority to be actually true.

Wait a minute Jen are you not a female dominant, so why do you bash this? It is just stupid to think one whole gender is superior to another whole gender. Both genders have our share of wise people and idiots.

If you want more specifics, I do not have any desire to think or want to feel superior to anyone let alone my lover my slave. If I felt superior to him that would mean quite simply I would not respect him and that would mean I do not love him and would not be with him. This thought process is why it is so stupid.

It is cool to play the thought in some way and I do not have a problem with that. But please anyone who takes this seriously has some issues to work through or are trying to work through their issues by buying into this lie.