Please Bang My Wife

Motivation of the man that needs to be cuckolded

In my humble opinion by far with not a close second the most under the radar sexual desire/fantasy/wish/practice out there is men wanting to be cuckold in some way. Whether like with a Mistress like me that it is part of a power exchange relationship or any other way in which a wife sleeps with other men this is way more prevalent in the thoughts of many men then most imagine. From my openly talking about it on the personal site I used to find my guy, my days in my local community in which we were out about it and my days involved in the swinging community I have always been stunned at the amount, different types and passion that men have for this.

I believe it is so under the radar because it is not manly compared to society norms so not only not talked about but often not pursued by men and just left in fantasies. Women who are often approached by their guys often suspicious that it is just a ruse so the man can be with other women. Finally the internet and the cuckold sites have distorted what cuckolding can actually be into something illogical, severe and not realistic.  A key component that so often is not communicated but is the most basic logic in the world. A woman is with her man because he won her heart. In a cuckolding situation the woman loves her man otherwise it would not be a cuckolding situation because she would not be there. 24/7 cruelty, humiliation and lack of intimacy including sexual just is a ridiculous concept when taking cuckolding into reality.

The following are types of motivation of men of all types out there in the world that are drawn to or live as cuckolds. Some only have one primary motivation but many, especially submissive men, can have several or more of these motivations. Some of these motivations have overlap and I separate them to make it easier and clearer.

1) A sexual fetish. Quite simply men turned on sexually just from the act or other things associated with the act that seeing or knowing their wife is getting fucked by another man goes straight to their cock getting rock hard. There are no underlying things going on if it is a fetish for a man this just arouses them.

Now sometimes men with this as a fetish can make the worse men to cuckold if wanting it in a power exchange way or the woman in the relationship wants to have some freedom of who and when. Quite simply once the male has an orgasm some of these men instantly revert back to insecure jealous husbands. This can cause a very roller coaster ride for the wife as the man builds up his desire for the woman to do another guy then after it happens the woman has to often work a lot harder then many other into cuckolding reassuring their man over a much longer time period. This will unfortunately make it too much about the husband and not enough us and for a Mistress like me, forget about it.

2) Men who enjoy and feel free of the responsibility of their wife having a satisfying sex life. This one is probably the most dominating motivation for a deeply submissive man in a power exchange relationship but still big one for many of the different types of men. Let’s face it, society has over history dumped the sexual satisfaction of the wife squarely on the husband. Pretty much the most out there definition of good sex is did or did not the woman orgasm during it.  Society projects a man can have many sexual conquests before marriage and infers the sexual expert. Women are to hide their sexual history and infer near virgin the better. A woman cuckolding their man is a very strong declaration of I am in control of my sexuality and therefore be satisfied because there are few limitations on her and this can be a great relief to a man.

This is particularly the case with submissive men. In power exchange an insecurity that is being soothed by what a person seeks out is the insecurity of their loved one leaving. Submissives actively want to see, hear and feel that their owner is happy and dominants seeing, hearing and feeling what their slaves will do, suffer or let them do for them soothes this insecurity. Sexual insecurity of do I do it for my cherished other is a standard one in many as well and for these two insecurities to intersect in a man the possibility of a cuckold situation to be what relieves them of their worries.

3) Men enjoying their woman embracing her sexuality and the lifting of sex from just being thought of something that might be done before going to bed in the bedroom. As I wrote in #2 society has preached for women to downplay their sexuality when they mature and become involved in a serious relationship/marriage. Even very sexual women when in a long term relationship tend to forget to bring the sexy and sexual aspects they maybe once did. The same old routine brings boredom, lack of motivation out of already getting the guy to forget the need to keep the guy and lives get busier causing less time and energy that we far too often take from our sex lives. All of a sudden what was once a very sexual relationship turns into an it is Saturday night I guess we can do it situation. Throw in many if not all of us have been in significant relationships that when they go bad sex and a sexual atmosphere disappears over time that men worry and question if the woman they are with even really likes sex.

Men with even average sexual drives like sex to be all over the place in their dream world. Any sexual thing done by their woman from the most minor to something major that communicates I love sex can be a wonderful thing to most men even if they cannot admit to it. For many men in society of course they want it to be solely contributed to the woman’s love of them. But for men with the cuckolding motivation it does not have to be tied into to them at all and just their woman is sexual.

Sexuality and creating a sexual atmosphere and good quantity and quality of sex can often when there is not something to derail it feed and sustain itself. A woman who has more options then just her husband for sexual escapades has part of her carefree single days restored to her if she wishes that and some of us do. Woman like this will often be and act more sexual overall in their life then someone turning it on and off because it only happens with the hubby sometimes at bedtime.

For example with me, I have a job that I work nights in a very stressful environment. One nice outlet to have when leaving work and looking to decompress is a nice roll in the hay. But I come home when most people are leaving for work. I enjoy cultivating some friends with benefits that have the same problem of living strange hours. While many that do my job fixate on comfort I almost always wearing lingerie that is not as much comfort designed as much as it is sexually stimulating. This makes my life more sexual and the fact the effort to think about the possibility of sex keeps it on the brain and therefore will make my sex life better.

4) The other men get a taste of what I have and they will never get. The hot much younger trophy wife on the shoulder of the much older man as he enjoys watching men stare at her and thinks to himself “you wish you were me”. The man on the beach with a smile from ear to ear as he sees men constantly checking out his wife who is wearing a tiny bikini, he is not simmering in jealousy and paranoia but his self esteem is getting a big old deposit into it by how men are drooling looking at his woman. Well some men love being cuckold for going the extra step and showing men how sexual their woman is and that the other men know they only get a taste and he gets the whole thing.

By the way a big misconception, like often when men approach the subject of cuckolding with their woman and her reaction is it is a ruse for them trying to have sex with other women, is why men who enjoy the swinging lifestyle. A majority of the men that embrace swinging are strongly motivated by #3 and #4 on this list. Some of my worse experiences with sex have to do with a swinging situation where the man I am with is way more into wanting to see his wife get fucked silly then do stuff with me.

5) Men that have had, believe they have had or believe they will have problems being good enough in bed with the woman they care about because of a small penis, impotency, shoot off too quickly, have low or no sex drives and just overly negative about how good they think they are in bed. While many of these men can fall into #2 unfortunately many of them truly have difficulty with actually being cuckold or their low self esteem in the sex area make it difficult for the woman they love to still get the sexual intimacy they want from the one they love.

Most women I know once love comes into play they will work with a man to find a fulfilling love life. For some of these people then cuckolding can be a solution. The problem comes when men, doing what men too often do, diagnose a problem and try to fix a problem without consulting his woman.

6) Men who truly enjoy knowing our seeing the woman they love having a blast. Since most men think an orgasm is the ultimate happy moment then a woman having a bunch of sex will maximize a woman’s happiness. Now this in healthy doses can be all fine and good and this includes cuckolding. There is something to be said in a very warm and loving way coming home from a sexual romp and see your slave all pumped up not out of horniness or feeling vulnerable but generally happy you look happy.

But often people with this desire can be too insecure into the unhealthy range and it actually hurts their ability to be submissive and suffocate another in a selfish and controlling way. Quite simply when they need too often to see you happy and communicating about it to them it can cease to be a genuine affection and be about soothing insecurity.

There was a female slave on a message board recently that wrote asking for advice how to serve and please her master more because he had to work longer hours and under more stress at work. It was quite clear to most she was really asking what could she do to draw positive attention to herself more. Chasing compliments and acts of love from someone is not submissive behavior but needy behavior. A man wanting to be cuckold because he needs too badly to know his wife is having a blast and that will be reflected back to him is only pushing expectations onto his other.

7) Male who have a slave mentality and truly love being dominated that the domination itself can be a sexual turn on. “If I am a devoted slave to my mistress I should never be able to control or limit her. Letting her do what she wishes in her sexual desires has to be her right.” In essence a man wishes to be cuckold because it shows his mistress he loves has accepted her power over him and enjoys dominating him. This is in essence what is happening when I write about the reward for obedience style fails in long term significant power exchange relationships. Because the slave stops feeling their owner is doing things for their own pleasure.

These relationships are like most other relationships then they are different. This means they will also go into the routine and predictable way of life after some time passes. The fact is a slave doing the same domestic stuff over and over is not really going to be any different then any other person in a relationship doing the same things they always do. Even if not careful the things we often do for discipline and fun can become less frequent and go too far in just top/bottom mutual fun. Slaves like to be dominated and need to feel dominated. One thing most people can agree with  a woman choosing to fuck who she wants and when she wants it is a truly dominating act and one at the top or near the top of things to make one feel dominated. For men that love that feeling cuckolding can be a big draw.

So in wrapping this up maybe I miss one or two or they might fit into one of these from my view. There are many motivations that can drive a man to want to be cuckold and a man can had several motivations. It would be wise to understand yourself and know what drives this desire in you if you are a man. It will help you find someone compatible or help you communicate your needs to your other.