Did Cyber Betray Femdom?

Hi my name is Jen. I am a female dominant. I also have some deep dark secrets. You see I like sex and I like kinky things like giving pain, humiliation, tying people up and cuckolding my slave. Now in my younger days maybe I was footloose and fancy free, falling into the wrong crowd and indulging in these things with my time in local communities mostly with my now ex slave/husband that we were together for over thirteen years. Now in the past year I have dipped my toe back into the single life through the new populace thing called the Internet it seems I was doing it all wrong and should maybe seek professional medical help to fix the error of my ways.

The preceding paragraph was written in the intent of being completely sarcastic. But I did put genuine truth in there that in the past year being the really first time I hit the Internet for this life and was genuinely stunned at what I found. Reading personal ads from other female dominants, various message boards and a few blogs it seem to be a “real” female dominant then one pretty much must be quite dismissive of sex and absolutely be very dispassionate to the point of being quite annoyed that kinky things are or might be done in a femdom relationships. I was disappointed that many of the male submissives seemed to take pride in how weak of human beings they were and pretended/lied that they had no other interests but to please a Mistress.

Chicken or the Egg?

Maybe someone can tell me which came first to cause this new world of female domination where female dominants were not suppose to have passion for the life in controlling a man with all the tools that make even more fun to do so and what happen to men that were submissive AND had sex on the brain? So is it many female dominants in cyber space dispassionate complainers or they feel it is the only way to portray the life to avoid male players? So are so many male submissives this pathetic and weak they cannot stand up for themselves or are they putting on an act because the woman posing as female dominants will only deal with them if they act like non normal males?

Because I do not get it at all. You can do power exchange with little kinky things or none at all if you are not into them. You can find male submissives with low sex drives if you have a low sex drive as well. When did it become rare or not cool to enjoy sex and have passion for some of the kinky things even to the point of having some fetishes?

Making female dominants look weak and like losers!

Now I am a big fan maybe you could call me a disciple of Elise Sutton. Now she writes in a way too broad of “all men” and I despise the term “female supremacy” unless it is in a playful way. But her philosophy is using the male for whom he is which for many is sex on the brain or as she likes to put it control a man through his cock. But cyber seems to try to pound into everyone that we should not only not control a man through his cock but it is practically a sin to acknowledge a male submissive has one. This troubles me greatly because to me this is not an enlightened thought.

Women throughout human history have used our feminine charms and the males drive to have them to get things we wanted and needed. To me this concept certainly falls into controlling them and therefore in the power exchange dynamic as well. Throughout history all women and my previous experience this includes female dominants have dealt with the horny male without ending all frazzled and wounded to want to dismiss men offhand. Also did we not have a hellacious fight as women to claim our sexuality over the centuries to stand up for liking sex and wanting to be sexually satisfied? It troubles me that the cyber female dominant seems to want to throw that away so easily.

In My Opinion

I have formed an opinion that actual female dominants (which I will define as ones that go out and live power exchange relationships in real life to whatever degree) have let the anonymity of the Internet and our own laziness to let the bored or damaged women posing as female dominants control the message of femdom. Because to me the message I have read in the past year is being a female dominant is hard because men think with their cocks and we shall not take any man serious until sex and this cock thing is totally dismissed. That because we are too lazy to deal with men we force men to lie and not be themselves which causes us more problems and more things to complain about until we all have swallowed the pill of deluding ourselves. That there are no decent male submissives out there or maybe more importantly no potential great male slaves out there once I get a hold of one.

My time in local communities way back when that now I wonder if it was in the prehistoric ages we as a group would have laughed off female dominants promoting this life about all about me being served and spoiled. Please prove to me you are a sincere man by doing all of my domestic chores, other labor projects and spend a lot of money on me and maybe I will spank you. Just the same way we would have laughed off men acting totally week and fictional in terms of not wanting anything or having any interest but one unselfish one would be called out as players. But it seems like today we embrace this.

Why have we let bored and damaged women frame what we are about and the joy and passion of female led relationships? Why are we letting women who pretty much throw their life away with instant messaging and finding any forum to male bash run the show? Men reading this why do you bow down to women that have had a profile up for months or years but have not been in a relationship during that time? I was on for less then a month and found plenty of men to be sincere and interesting enough to lose the masks of cyber and venture forward. It does not mean they all would have been princes if I kissed them but I was out to find one for real life.

Yes there are plenty of male players out there and many female ones as well. But when did we as female dominants become too afraid of them to let them run the show. Since when did being a female dominant leave us with an entitlement of any male interested in us should be a perfect finished model of male submissiveness to our utopian wishes. Way back when I started we expected the male species to have many rough edges and it was not only our desire and effort to turn this rough model into a beautiful finished model for ourselves it was a lot of the enjoyment. What happened!