Pros, Hoes and Tribute

The flammable female dominants and self esteem and ego messed up discussions when discussing these two topics pro dommes and tributes. To me they can be two different things so I will write about them separately.

Pro Dommes

I do not see why people have a problem with a pro dommes. A man pays some money and a woman does some things to them. I think often the debate and harsh words are just ego driven that both people who dislike pro dommes and pro dommes themselves add fuel to the fire. Female dominants that lash out at pros more often then not are lashing out because they feel it cheapens their own title and pro dommes lash out of frustration from this because many try to tie in what they do for money to be similar to what people do in our relationships which is just not the same.

My view of pro dommes can be expressed very simply, a pro domme may or may not be an actual female dominant but they are all women that take money to top men. An analogy would be going skiing you maybe a skier or you maybe just go skiing because your other wants to or for a social event and that just putting on skis and going down a slope does not make one an actual skier.

I do get why a man whether just a bottom type or a submissive that wants to get bottom cravings done would go to a pro domme but I do not get how an actual submissive man can get anymore needs then that. I mean how a submissive man could take pleasure in seeing enjoyment of a pro when it is almost certainly fake or contingent first and foremost with the cash they forked over. I mean how pleasurable could a submissive feel being paddled on the ass knowing the female dominant is thinking how much longer until I shove him out the door and I can go back to watching Oprah.

Tributes

I will be honest here and be in the minority of female dominants whether they ask for tributes or not but defend this practice, I take a severely dim view of female dominants claiming to want to be in a relationship of some type that require tributes.

First this is a wide topic so let me narrow down my rant. Let me dismiss two types of tributes the significant money tribute which is of course pros who either are worried about legalities, their advertisements being pulled or worry about being attacked. The other type is what I call future pros in transition. Women who have gotten a taste of men giving them things to be bottomed but are not yet comfortable turning professional so they are in between tributes as small tokens and cold hard cash.

Now to me this leaves two types of female dominants that require tributes:

1) Women who want a relationship of a personal nature. Whether just their one and only or just want a small group of regulars but require tributes to be of significant nature at least some of the time otherwise they see the men. I find these women to have a part combination of playing and leading men falsely on and fooling themselves.

You will hear female dominants who do this point to it costs money for toys and outfits and wanting to be sure a man is serious and not just out for casual kinky actions. I do not believe this holds any water. We do not ask others for money or free stuff if we take up a hobby or sport that costs money do we? If we take up skiing we buy our equipment and pay the fees to ski. If money is an issue in our life we budget, save or look at ways we can do things cheaply and in femdom and BDSM it can be done very cheaply as I myself can afford anything I want yet have hardly any leather outfits and a toy collection that takes up very little space.

If this man or these men actually meant anything to them then these female dominants would be expressing it in a way that the men would become part of their lives in a meaningful way. If that is the case then these men, like any other men in relationships, would probably be more then happy to help out buying their Mistress outfits and toys they would like to see used. The other bone of contention with this approach of a tribute is how any rational man could think a female dominant is sincere in having any feelings for you if you are only welcomed when dolling out significant money in a form of a gift.

The other point of wanting to know if the man is serious and not a player is beyond lame. There must be a thousand ways to figure this out, but of course if any man can play if he shows up with a significant tribute really speaks more about the female dominant and their motivations for getting something then anything a man is revealing.

To demand things like this upfront to me signals that the women like this are not open minded and open hearted to a man.

2) Female Dominants that only require small inexpensive tokens as tributes. Now these women are in an entirely different category then the ones discussed before. These are women that it truly is not ever about some material gain on their part.

What is more special and meaningful to a woman, flowers given to her by a man just because he wanted to or flowers given to her by a man because it was expected of him out of a holiday or some event? I do not know of any woman that does not answer it is way more special and touching to receive flowers by a man just because he wanted to. Then why do some female dominants insist on small tributes?

I think for some they just enjoy getting a token of appreciation and use the tribute part of female domination in a comfortable non greedy way to enjoy at least a level of that appreciation. Like my question right above it does not mean a woman does not like getting flowers on her birthday or Valentine’s Day.

But I think for many these small tributes are about over coming societal attitudes when it comes to some sort of intimacy is not to be shared without uttering the word love. Most that I have talked to and read their words that require small tributes are not looking for their one as much as just having one or a few casual play partners. I think for them to just show up and play can make them feel used in away and a small token of tribute makes them feel better about the causal intimate dynamic. Because of this I am not one to bash these types except for when they get a little too carried away with their deluded justifications or they need to support other types of tributes because they feel an attack on any type of tribute is an attack on them.

All I know is this for me, I never had Dave give me a tribute. In the time we have been together he has given me flowers twice and bought and installed a new doorbell I had casually talked about needing replaced. Sure I could have ordered him to do these things or any other man that was interested in me but ordering would not made my heart to speed up, my pussy to get wet and my brain to learn more about Dave in a wonderful good way then if I had demanded those things.

Female dominants asking for tributes are revealing more about themselves then they will ever get men to reveal in themselves for giving into their demands.